Joy and Sorrow

I've been thinking...

There is a kind of joy in sorrow.

Think of the times that you laugh until you cry, or when something is so good it hurts. Life is good, but it pulls at your heart strings. Loving someone makes your heart leap for joy. It also causes it to ache. In the aching, there is the satisfaction of having loved. The depth of the feeling of separation or loss is painful, but there is joy in having the capacity to love...and to hurt. When you lose someone, you will hurt, deeply. But with the hurt, remember you have loved and been loved. When you love, there is the joy of knowing you will hurt, and when you hurt, there is the joy of knowing you love.

There is poetry in depth of emotion. I am thankful that I can feel, that I am not numb to pleaure and pain.
There is tension between good and evil, hope and despair, pleasure and suffering, love and hate, joy and sorrow. Life is not easy. There is heartache, struggle, tears. But there is a pathway of joy.

But the path of the righteous is like the light of dawn, which shines brighter and brighter until full day. Proverbs 4:18
Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfector of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. Hebrews 12:1-2






Brother Caleb and I














Cousin Cara and I

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To those I am missing now, I love you.

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Colorado

My favorite picture from the Colorado trip. As I was propping my camera on rocks for a tripod, an elk call echoed across the valley. This bull elk with a huge rack came sauntering towards the stream for a drink.

When I get around to it, I'll share a few more moments from the trip.

NPO Diets

This evening I had a patient who is mentally slow, gifted in drawing, and wonderful to care for. He is planning to go to Texas next summer, and here is his list for the trip:

Sears Store

1. Umbrella

2. Cowboy hat

3. Number shirt

4. T-top with pictures

5. Leather gloves for a cowboy

He explained his routine of an evening snack of something like pudding or a number of other things. When I told him that he still couldn't have anything to eat, he wrote on his hand "NPO diets" and looked at me saddly for confirmation. It's a lovely diet: nothing by mouth, and I get to enforce it.

What a Night!

I'm super stimulated from my evening at work! A few of you have probably never seen me in this condition, but believe me, I can get pretty hyper at times. First of all, I have discovered that I LOVE teaching! As a nurse, I get ample opportunity for that. On my first day off orientation, I had two nursing students following me. Last summer, I got to have a summer nursing intern with me for awhile. Now that I have over a year of experience, I have been able to orient several RN orientees for at least a day at a time. On Monday evening and again this evening, I was with the same RN orientee. She and I got far more than we bargained for.

She is great and will be a wonderful nurse, but she needs more confidence. Also, there are so many important things that have somehow been missed with her, so I was constantly explained everything to her. And finally, we had quite a patient today!!! At the end of the day, which was at about 0130, we figured that about 75% of our time was spent IN her room, much less getting supplies together, figuring out orders, charting, and taking care of our other two patients. And when we weren't in her room, guess what? Her call light was on.

What was it with this patient? She had been assigned her own nurse for a while today because a medicine had made her confused. She has tubes and drains of every shape, size, and function. To that, add bleeding around those tubes and drains. To that, add IV nutrition, pain meds enough to kill a horse, meds every hour at least, wacky blood sugars, and yes, receiving blood products. Oh, and ANXIETY! Did I add the weird swelling that was a major concern? Oh, and she was paranoid! In fact, she had the blood transfusion nurse show her all of his badges and ID's. They looked like they were for a Mayo employee, but it was concerning that one of them had no writing on the back. Okay, so looking back over it all, we should have put her back on an individual assignment. What was I thinking. She wasn't pulling at tubes, really confused, or otherwise a danger to self or others though.

It was quite a learning experience for my orientee though! I tried to convince her that anything will seem easy after this. All of the intense work, assessment, and communication with the doctors and other people involved in the care was so much fun!!! Maybe that is why I am moving to the ICU.

To throw in some variety, another nurse covered for us from around 2120 until 2150 so we could go eat a bite. The nursing students were all waiting in the conference room for their clinical instructor. It was their last clinical, and they were wondering when they could start their post conference. Finally, just for fun, I said, "Okay guys, let's start post conference. Did anything interesting happen today?" (As I write this, I am laughing out of control. It must be late at night.) One student's patient nearly quit breathing. We were well into post-conference when the instructor came in:) Maybe it's a good thing we know each other! It would be a blast to be a clinical instructor. Maybe I'll get to do that sometime.

Back to the floor, we were busy finishing things up, talking to the doctor, and charting until 0130. That's two hours later than we should have been finishing. On a side note, I didn't even go to the bathroom from 1400 until 0045. Just forgot.

Anyway, I brought my pathophysiology books back from home, so I need to develop a strategy for studying more so I can care for my patients and teach others better. Life is great! Now that it's 0240, maybe I should think about heading to bed, getting up, doing laundry, packing, working, sleeping, and flying to Colorado to visit my wonderful, big brother, Caleb!!!

A Few Things

The last few days...

Aunt Nancy and Uncle Vlad were passing through Rochester, so we spent a few hours a couple of times eating lunch and visiting:)

My friend, Bev, and I took a drive to the Lanesboro area and the places where she was born and raised. You know those roads that beckon to be explored? Those are the types of little back roads that we traveled. She hadn't been back to see that area for years, and I think it made her month!

I interviewed for a job on the ICU (intensive care unit) float staff and got it! I won't start until February 6th, but I think it's worth the wait. I'll get 5-6 months of classroom and on the job training for eight ICU's here at Mayo. The only ones I cannot work in will be the pediatric and neonatal ICU's. Once trained, my job will be to work in whichever ICU needs me that day. Some days I will cover the resource nurse pager for the hospital. All of this sounds so exciting to me, but once my training is over, I will have a one year committment. That means that I will probably be here at least until July or August of 2009.

Right now, I am sitting in a patient's room listening to him snore...

Milo Harvest

Well, here are the pictures of milo harvest.
Daddy in the combine.

Though not this time, our grain often goes to the Gruver elevators, Sunray Coop.

Mama's driving in the combine, and I'm goofing off while waiting...

Here's proof I was there! I got to drive the combine and graincart as well as ride with Daniel in the truck.

Colorful milo in various stages of maturity.
Daniel and Daddy tarping the truck.
Daniel unloading the truck at Texas Farm, the hog feed company that Daddy was selling it to.
The first day, we only harvested a little before deciding that it was too green. The next time we harvested... ...we were rained out.

Well, for a little Amy update:

Last weekend, I went down to Ben and Tandalee's. We spent most of Saturday at Aunt Nancy and Uncle Vlad's lovely new house while eating Aunt Nancy's excellent cooking! Today, Aunt Nancy and Uncle Vlad stopped by for a few hours on their way to Minneapolis. We enjoyed the 80+ October weather by eating outside and walking around some.

As many of you know, I love playing Ultimate Frisbee. It has been harder to do that after college, but recently I started playing with an informal group. Through that, I learned about another group that I played with today. Let me tell you, these folks are serious! There weren't too many people there, so it was 5 on 5, which equals lots of running. The girl I was guarding runs faster than I do:) Though they were intense, they said I "have potential" and taught me the official rules and gave me tips along the way. I plan to play with them when possible, which means I need to get in better condition.